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by Frank Padilla, CFC Pastoral Center Director
Reprinted from October, 1996 issue of Ugnayan Magazine
Despite the good that Couples For Christ (CFC) is doing in the Church, there are still some persons, lay and clergy alike, that oppose CFC. This document cites some of the issues that these individuals have, presented with the truth on these issues.
Issue: CFC is an Elitist Organization; It Is Only for the Rich
Truth: CFC is for everyone and makes no distinction as to economic status, nor to social, educational, racial or other distinctions. The current membership of CFC includes the very rich (millionaires living in luxury homes) and the very poor (unemployed squatters), and all others in between. On the average, the greater number of CFC's membership is probably in the middle and lower-middle economic class.

CFC is doing a lot of work with the poor. We are in many squatter areas, in fishing communities, in remote mountain barrios, among the sacadas in haciendas, and among such unprivileged classes as the untouchables in India. We have currently embarked on a sustainable community development project in Bagong Silang, Novaliches (Philippines) where we will look not only to the spiritual well-being of people, but also to their socio-economic uplifting. After our initial experience here, we intend to replicate this model in many other depressed areas in the country. We will be actively helping build a Church of the Poor.

But given our extensive work with the poor, we certainly do not neglect the rich. Jesus came for sinners, and there are lots of them among the rich, as well as among the poor. In fact, Jesus has said that it is hard for the rich man to enter heaven (Mt 19:23-24). All in need of God's mercy and blessings are therefore the object of our work in CFC.

Issue: CFC Is Not Parish-Based; They Act Independently of the Parish Priest
Truth: CFC is a lay ministry, with lay charisms and lay leadership. This is how God has raised up CFC and intends it to be. This is how many bishops have encouraged us to remain. This is in line with lay empowerment by the Holy Spirit. And in this sense, CFC can do its work without the direct, hands-on involvement of the clergy.

However, CFC is also very much a part of the Church, and does not act independently of the hierarchy or the ministerial priesthood. Thus, CFC recognizes the overall leadership and authority of the ordained ministers within the Church. CFC works in active submission to the bishops and in communion with the rest of the Church.

As part of the Church's pastoral oversight over the work of CFC, we have as Spiritual Directors three bishops for the whole Philippines (in effect over the CFC Council which governs the work of CFC worldwide), we have the bishop of each diocese as Spiritual Director over CFC in his area, and the parish priest of each parish as the Spiritual Adviser of CFC in his area. This is the normal pattern, in accordance with CFC's own wishes, though there may be some divergence due to clerical preferences in a particular area.

CFC considers itself as as both transparochial and parish-based. CFC as one community worldwide is necessarily transparochial, since the one body straddles many different dioceses and parishes. On the other hand, CFC is divided into smaller bodies called chapters, and these chapters are based in their respective parishes. The CFC membership in these chapters live out their Christian lives within the context of their parishes, evangelizing their parish milieus and serving in various functions within the parish.

CFC is a strong support to parish priests, especially as CFC brings back to the Church many nominal Christians. Further, many CFC members serve in various ways in the parish--as parish pastoral council members, as Eucharistic ministers, as lectors, as heads and members of various parish groups, as fund-raisers, etc. In many parishes, the involvement of CFC has freed up the parish priest of many tasks and allowed him to concentrate more on his sacramental and pastoral duties.

CFC, while having its own distinct life and mission, coordinates its activities with the parish, purposely trying to avoid schedule conflicts. CFC urges its members to actively support parish life and activities, without prejudice to its own life and mission. Given a schedule conflict, CFC does not automatically give priority to its own activity, but considers both CFC and the parish as of equal importance, making its decision on what to do based on a careful evaluation of each situation.

Issue: CFC Is Not Catholic
Truth: CFC is a Catholic group, but open to membership by Christians of other denominations. This is very much in line with the Catholic Church's thrust and Pope John Paul II's emphasis on Christian unity and ecumenical relationships as we approach the end of the millennium.

Jesus himself prayed for unity among his followers (Jn 17:11). True Christian unity will probably not be achieved by theologians debating about what is theologically correct, or of Church hierarchies insisting on their traditions and cultural/liturgical life, but by lay groups at the grassroots who love the Lord and can find practical ways of worshipping and living their lives in common. This we believe is what we have in CFC.

In the Philippines, CFC is in practically all the dioceses, working with the approval of and under the authority of the bishops. CFC is a member of the Council of the Laity of the Philippines, the umbrella for Catholic lay groups in the country. And CFC has also been formally recognized by the Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) as a National Private Association of the Lay Faithful. Thus the Philippine bishops as one body has approved of CFC as a Catholic group, including its teachings and approaches to Christian life and renewal. In other countries as well, CFC does its work with the approval of the local Church authorities.

Issue: CFC Does Not Emphasize Mary or the Sacraments
Truth: CFC provides Catholics what is not normally adequately fostered in many parishes: a deep personal relationship with Jesus, study and appreciation for the Bible, vibrant worship, warm fellowship, cell groups, ongoing formation and leadership training, zeal for evangelization, pastoral care for children and youth, lay empowerment. Thus our emphasis is in these areas. But since CFC is not another Church, nor a group apart from life in the parishes, it does not duplicate what is readily available in ordinary Catholic life. In fact, CFC supports parish life. Thus its members attend Sunday masses and other Church activities in the parish, and looks to the parish priest to provide leadership and instruction in the area of distinctively Catholic teachings.

The reality is that even without much instruction on Mary and the sacraments within CFC, its members grow in veneration of the Blessed Mother and in appreciation and reception of the sacraments. In other words, CFC members, because of CFC's inputs on the Christian life, become better and more committed Catholics.

Finally, CFC welcomes and invites the clergy to give its members teachings on Catholic doctrines and other distinctively Catholic teachings and inputs.

Issue: CFC Collects Tithes and Takes Money Away from the Parish
Truth: CFC does teach about financial stewardship, including the practice of tithing. Because of these teachings, its members become aware of true Christian stewardship and begin to live out its principles. Its members grow in financial generosity and in using their resources not only for themselves but for others.

CFC does not require its members to give it any money, nor is giving money to CFC a condition for membership. However, members are encouraged to be Christian stewards, including giving their tithes for the work of the Church. CFC leaves it up to the individual how he/she will divide the tithe among CFC, their parish, and any other worthwhile Christian group or apostolate. CFC does encourage its members to be generous in giving to the parish.

Because of CFC, parishioners become much more generous, starting to give to the Church several times the amount of money they have been used to giving. Thus, even if parishioners give to CFC, what they give to the parish becomes much larger than what they had previously been giving.

Sometimes, the issue seems to be the claim that "tithes" ought to be given to the Church, and not be collected by any group. First of all, it must be acknowledged that it is groups such as CFC that have been successful in getting their members to tithe. The hierarchy has been largely unable to get the typical Catholic to part with his or her money to give to the Church. Second, yes tithes are to be given to the Church, but a group such as CFC is Church, doing the apostolic work of the Church, and thus is entitled to the money that is given to further the life and mission of the Church.

Issue: CFC Takes Leaders Away From the Parish
Truth: The presence of CFC in a parish results not only in more committed parishioners but also in a greater number of trained leaders and parish workers. The problem in many parishes is that there is just a small core group of leaders, who are tapped to do everything. CFC, by its life and culture, spreads leadership over a greater number. In turn, these leaders are able to take on various responsibilities in the parish. Thus the parish' team of leaders and committed workers is enlarged.

Further, through CFC the potentials for greater leadership are developed. A parish leader who previously did multiple tasks is enabled to focus on developing other leaders and workers, such that he effectively multiplies himself. He is thus able to share parish tasks and responsibilities with many others.

Sometimes, a parish priest's complaint is that his parish leaders do service outside their parish. This does happen through the ministry of CFC. However, this is something good and ought not to be complained about. Why?

First, before we take a parish leader to do service outside his own parish, we have already raised up other parish workers (notice the plural) to share the work in the parish. Second, if no one from outside a particular parish had come in the first place to serve in the parish, then that particular parish would not have benefited from the renewal happening outside its territory. Thus, "The gift you have received, give as a gift" (Mt l0:8). Third, it ought to be a privilege and a blessing for a parish priest to have his parishioners serve other parishes. Fourth, we ought not to have a parochial mentality, since we are the universal Church, and our concern is not just for our own parish but for the whole body of Christ.

Issue: CFC Takes Members Away From Other Religious Organizations; There are Already Other Religious Organizations and There is No Need for More
Truth: There is always a need for another effective group. There is so much work to be done, especially in reaching out to nominal Catholics. The problem is not too many groups, but too few workers in the harvest!

Also, the Holy Spirit raises up a variety of charisms and ministries, so that there is something for everyone. Different people will be attracted to different types of spirituality. There is the contemplative on the one hand and the charismatic on the other. There is the loose prayer group on the one hand and the covenant community on the other. There is Marian spirituality, Opus Dei spirituality, and so on. People need to find their own places in God's kingdom, and a greater variety allows for more evangelistic success.

Unlike most Church organizations, CFC is very effective in evangelizing nominal Christians. It is a fact that almost everywhere, only a small minority of Catholics are committed to their spiritual lives. And even those serving in many parish organizations are themselves in sore need of renewal and formation in discipleship. And many groups within the parish provide care and formation only to those who are already actively going to Church. The work of CFC expands the committed Church membership.

There are times when members of parish groups leave their groups and concentrate on membership in CFC. This is not bad. First of all, religious groups should not think in terms of owning their members but of just serving them, to the extent that they are best able to do so. If they can be served better by another group, then that should happen. Second, God often works in stages in the lives of his people; thus one may pass through various groups before finding the one God intends for him/her. Thus, to keep a person in a particular group as a way of protecting that group is wrong and is a failure in love, in that a person is prevented from receiving what God might have in store for him/her in another group.

As far as CFC is concerned, we support all Spirit-led Christian groups. We are not in competition with any, but consider all as part of the one work of the Holy Spirit. We rejoice when any of our own members move on to another group, if that seems to be God's design for them. Our goal is not per se to enlarge the membership of CFC, but to enlarge the kingdom of God.

Issue: CFC's Thrust Does Not Fit In to the Parish' Pastoral Plans
Truth: CFC is engaged in the most important areas of Christian mission: evangelization and family life renewal. These are the deepest and most basic needs of the Church today, indeed of any time. It is not possible to have too much emphasis on these two areas: the salvation of souls and the strengthening of the family, which is the basic unit of society and of the Church. Thus there is no way that the pastoral thrust of CFC cannot fit in to the life and mission of the Church, or of her pastoral subdivisions, the parishes.

In fact, the problem with some parishes today is that they are focused on the nonessentials, such as socio-cultural activities or fundraising. Further, some Church workers do a lot of work, but neglect their own growth in holiness or the renewal of their marriage and family life. Still further, much parish emphasis is on serving and caring for its active members, with not too much effort in the re-evangelization of nominal Christians. Also, many Church organizations lack effective formation in discipleship.

CFC gets down to basics and essentials. And this is what is needed in the Church today, indeed for any time.

Issue: The Thrust of the Philippine Church is to Establish Basic Ecclesial Communities (BECs); Thus This Direction Rather Than CFC Is Preferred
Truth: Though there are different definitions of what a BEC is, we can basically say that a BEC is a small neighborhood faith sharing group, intended to revive and support Christians at the grassroots level. It is with this definition in mind that we wholeheartedly agree with this thrust of the church. In fact, all CFC members are in such cell groups. We maintain that our households in CFC are BECs, that is, small territorial cell groups that provide support for the Christian life of our members.

The experience of BECs in the Church has not been very good. This is so because many important elements for success are lacking: genuine conversion, solid and ongoing formation, anointed leadership, committed relationships, a clear vision, an evangelistic lifestyle, couples participating rather than just one spouse of a couple, a clear call to holiness and discipleship. These we try to provide in CFC. And many people who have experienced BEC in their parish and who have moved on to CFC always share about what a different experience it has been for them

It is important for parish priests not to lose sight of the objective for promoting BECs. The BEC is just an instrument for achieving the goal, which is to renew and strengthen the people of God. The BEC is just a means to an end. The thrust of the Church is not BEC per se, but renewal. If CFC can achieve this goal as well, or even do a better job of it, then it is foolish to insist on BEC to the exclusion of CFC. It is also of no use to debate about the precise definition of BEC, and then to insist that CFC households do not fit the definition.


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